Amazing How Things Change

So the day of rest has finally arrived.

What will you be doing with yourself?

Me? Well I shall be taking the dog on a nice long walk, heading as usual up to the Ridgeway and taking in the amazing scenery and sights along the way.

However, several years ago, this would have been unheard of. Sunday for me was always about meeting the guys in the pub, having some drinks and watching the football. Back then, not only was I a smoker and more than happy to consume many many pints of lager over the course of the day (and it was the day because we would start at opening time -11am and finish at closing time – 12am) but I always compounded my calorific intake by heading home via the Kebab shop, Chinese takeaway or Pizza parlour.

I write in my header “Amazing How Things Change” but in all honesty, they had to. The life I was living was simply NOT sustainable. There is NO WAY that my body could cope with the lifestyle I was putting it through. There was NO WAY my mind could cope with all of the hate I felt for myself, all of the anxiety I felt, all of the self doubt and poor self image. I think the way that Lao Tsu said “If you are depressed you are living in the past. If you are anxious you are living in the future. If you are at peace then you are living in the present” summed up my life pretty well. I was unable to cope with the coming life that was presented to me, unable to cope with what had gone before and as for living in the present and being at peace, well that was only a pipe dream I am sure.

I worked hard and I played hard. I thought that was all there was to life. I carried on this lifestyle even when my friends had calmed down and stopped. I would still be out. I simply found new people to go out with, new people to hang around with, new people to make me feel good.

I am amazed I lasted as long as I did. I was lucky enough to never develop Diabetes, to suffer from high Blood Pressure, to have any Pulmonary issues of any kind. All that I did was get older, more unhealthy and more unhappy until I hit the breaking point and decided to seek help.

I was speaking to someone the other day about the amount of steps I have to climb in my building before I am at my front door. I was relaying my story about how before my operation I never went out without absolutely everything and if I had forgotten something I would seriously consider whether I actually needed it or not before having to walk back up all of the stairs I had just descended, yet now I literally ran up and down the steps instead of limping my way slowly to the top. It was at this point when he said it was probably the fact that I had to climb the steps that kept me going as long as I had done without issue. At first we treated it as a throwaway remark but the more I consider it, the more I honestly believe he had a good point well made.
You see it only take the smallest amount of activity to keep us from falling over the edge and weirdly it was lucky that I lived on the top floor and had to scale 48 steps each time I came home. Now this may not sound like much but consider putting that 25 stone (350lbs/159kgs) on one leg and having to push up, then repeat with the next leg, then repeat etc etc.

I know I had a little wobble a couple of weeks ago but on the whole I have to say that today I now try to live my life by another of Lao Tsu’s teachings “When I let go of what I am, I might become what I might be” I know that I am a good way from actually becoming the man I want to be but I am closer than I have been in many years. A healthy diet and lifestyle make you more centred and at ease with yourself. It is a known fact that before you can be at ease with or love anyone else you must first be at ease with or love yourself, which makes perfect sense because if you don’t rate you then how do you think anyone else is going to rate you.

I am currently on this journey of mine (even though I abhor the word journey when used in this frame of reference) and honestly as each day passes I become happier and more centred. I have no idea what happened at the beginning of the week to make this so but it is as though a switch were thrown and I can now see the forrest through the trees and am understanding more and more what I am to do and how I am to get there. I know it will not be easy, I am sure I will make mistakes along the way but compared to this time last year, you would certainly agree it really is amazing how things change.

FOOD DIARY:Friday 18th September 2015

Qty Measure Food Calories (gr) Protein (gr) Carbs (gr) Fat (gr)
Breakfast  1  Small  Lean Sausage  111  12  3  8
1  Small  Lean Bacon Rasher  122  26  0  17.5
 2  50gms Six Seeded Brown Batch Toasted 136  11.6  31.6  9
Lunch  2  83gms BBQ Marinaded Salmon Fillet  416  40  8.4  24.6
 1  50gms  Wholegrain Rice  70  1.5  12.25  1.5
Dinner  1  150gms Spicy Mediterranean Chicken  172  33.4  1.3  3.4
 1  95gms Fiery Chilli and Almond Pesto  212  4  5  18.6
Snacks  2  400mls  Latte  210  12  18  8
 2  400mls  Tea  11.8  0  0.8  0
Totals  1460.8  140.5  80.35  90.6
Water  4  500mls  Mineral Water  0  0  0  0

So the food for Friday wasn’t too bad if I am honest, carbs were kept low which is ideal considering I was on an enforced rest day after my knee started to play up. The reason the fats were up is only because there was fish and a pesto sauce with nuts in so these fats are both acceptable.

There was no exercise yesterday and no walking so to speak although I did take the dog out for a little meander after I returned from helping my friend with his narrowboat. This means no Polar H7 or Map May Walk screenshots for a second day but my Jawbone Up2 still read a sensible 8713 steps for the day.

IMG_1999

‘Till tomorrow.

Stay out of the fridge.

9 thoughts on “Amazing How Things Change

  1. sleeveforme22 says:

    I remember questioning if I needed something too if it meant tackling a flight of stairs. I have stairs in my home and would even put off going down there just because of the laboring it took to come back up them. Now it is never in question and I love it. Now I find reasons to go down them just to get the credit on my FitBit!!

    Liked by 1 person

    • Worlds Biggest Fridge Magnet says:

      Amazing how we change and learn to embrace our new found lives. This is why we must remain true and really do our best to live our lives by the standards we have set ourselves.
      It is so great that I get the positive affirmation of others when they see something that resonates and makes us realise that we are NOT alone in the fight for health.
      We will prevail!!

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Julie says:

    I have been up in your ancestrial neck of the woods again this weekend, Gatehouse of Fleet, I too have been writing about change, I never would have walked in this area of beauty as I am doing now simply because I was out of breath, sore and hot! It struck me sitting up on the coastal cliff yesterday how amazing life is if you decide to live it, really appreciating where I have come from and where I want to get to.
    PS If you do decide to walk Hadrians Wall, let me know, we live 20 mins from the middle of it and am happy to walk some of it with you. You have made amazing changes.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Worlds Biggest Fridge Magnet says:

      Wow Julie, that is so amazing that you make that offer. I have a plan to walk Hadrians wall at some point.Next year is obviously the charity walk of the Ridgeway but maybe this could be the impetuous I need to add the other walk I want to do into the mix.
      Maybe it could work. Some kind of North and South things.

      This needs some thought for sure but thanks for the offer and if and when I find myself in your neck of the woods, I will certainly let you know…!

      As for the walking in the G of F, I am quite jealous and you are so right, if we choose to live our lives we will get so much more back in personal return than any sitting at home, shutting ourselves away or over eating……

      Keep it up Julie. Only WE can win our battles and the first battle is with ourselves and it looks like you have already crushed that one… 😉

      Liked by 1 person

  3. New Journey says:

    Good post Cameron…I am wondering why the word Journey for this part of weight loss you abhore?? It has caused me to think about why I choose it….I can only come to the conclusion it was the word that expressed the path I was taking…for me weight loss is like a walk blindfolded in the woods…something I haven’t done in over 30 years….or at least taken seriously….even when I had a trainer in 2007, I wouldn’t let him weigh me or measure me, and after I was done at the gym, I went to the next driveway and picked up a KFC mashed potato bowl to eat on the way home…I wasn’t serious about it really only reason I went was because I paid and I hate throwing money down the drain….in retrospect I was still grieving for my sisters death and food was my pain reliever…I did get some good out of my $$$ put into “getting into shape” it took months to start to see a change…but I did….then I didn’t care anymore and stopped….it really is all about attitude and having your head screwed on straight, so to say…then it made me think….when will I be off my journey, will I know when I have arrived….it seems I have named my last years of life whether there 5, 10 or 20 or more, a journey…it seemed to fit…..hope your knee is better…I can relate….kathy

    Liked by 1 person

    • Worlds Biggest Fridge Magnet says:

      I think we are always on our journey Kathy. No matter where we are on it, what time frame we put on it or what, we are always on it. I suppose I dislike the Journey word for myself because I have had it thrown at me for the past two years and people seem to think that it only started in February of 2014 when I decided to go for the survey and will end when I have hit target. For me there will never be an end and the beginning was the day I was born. We make decisions every day that affect and change our lives. One day we just decide to make the right choice and hope that we keep on making it.
      I do not mean to denigrate your choice of words, it is simply how I feel about my situation. I shall be on my journey for the rest of my life whether big or small, hard or easy. I prefer to look at it as a new path I have chosen rather than the other word…
      Hope that makes sense and please know that I really did not mean to offend.
      Cameron

      Like

      • New Journey says:

        No offense was taken but its interesting on how we all interrupt our lives…I have changed my view to your way of thinking….we are all on a journey from birth to death…but the paths change….thank you for your view..never worry I rarely get offended… and it makes better sense now!!! thanks kathy

        Liked by 1 person

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