Feeling A Bit Leftover

Saturday evening has really done a number on me. I found myself all day yesterday feeling as flat as a pancake – only emotionally speaking though; and as a close friend chose to remind me, it would happen but it would be a couple of years before I actually was flat because for the time being, I was still round! Mates eh? Who’d have ’em!

Anyway as I said, yesterday saw me feeling a touch fed up I suppose and it got me to start thinking as to why and I have determined it was one of two things, either I was a little more poorly than I initially thought or I was more overwhelmed by the evening in the company of people whom I have not seen for many many years.

Possibly it was a mixture of the two.

After I had started to recover a little from my “funny turn” I was brought home by a friend who very kindly saw me up to my apartment just to make sure I had no incidents on the many stairs I needed to climb. I sat quietly for a while then took some more orange juice, sat at my computer and started to write yesterday’s post. I figured it could be done then with little change between 12 midnight and 7.30 am when it was posted, after all, I was only going to be in a bed fast asleep. Or so I thought. I very quickly tripped off the post, describing how wonderful it was to once more meet people from my past, meaning at just before one am I was ready to adjourn for the evening and travel the big wooden hill to Bedfordshire. I decided to read for a while and still not sleepy kept reading until the book was finished and the time was well past two am. However, this still did not seem to matter my sleep cycle (I’m not sure what make it is, but last night it felt bloody old and rusty with punctures, no saddle and a broken chain 😉 ) as I lay there going over the nights complications and conversations deciding to give up looking at my watch at gone four am. I must have fallen asleep because I woke at eight am to a plethora of messages and deciding they could wait, rolled over and drifted off once again for a couple of hours.

So the day started as usual with a cup of Yorkshire Gold tea and I began to reply to all of the messages wishing me well. I took time to read my emails as I did some admin on the blog site, the twitter account and the Facebook page. All the while feeling decidedly flat. It was as though I had spent the weekend with good friends or a lover and they had left me at my own house with my own thoughts as their life continued on outside and I stayed home on a bright and sunny but quiet Sunday.

Maybe it was the fact that I had been building up to attending the reunion and now it was over I was possibly left feeling relieved and maybe just worn out from all of the effort it had taken to attend. I had gone on my own and had no old school friends that I was still in touch with to rely on as a foil so it was a constant procession of bums on seats as people came to greet me. Don’t get me wrong, it was great to speak to each and every one of the people I did spend time with but emotionally it may have been a bridge to far, possibly using up a little too much of my reserves of confidence and dwindling social skills. I have by my own admission limited my group of friends quite drastically and although I do have many I have very few that I might be able to spend time with on a one on one basis. Still that is mine own cross to bear and I offer it as a reason for my issues although some others may find it resonates in some way with them.

Of course, it could simply be a fact that I didn’t plan very well for this evening out, I didn’t consider how warm it would actually be when I put on a shirt, tie and sweater only to start overheating much later in the evening. It is also without doubt as my old school friend (you know, the one that paid attention) thought, I was dehydrated which I imagined I couldn’t be but consider the diuretic effect of the two cappuccino coffees I supped. Since having the surgery I have to understand that I will not be able to drink as much alcohol due to the fact it will now be absorbed into my bloodstream so much quicker; and as this is the case, would it not be reasonable to assume my discomfort could in part also be due to the effects of the caffeine being absorbed so much more quickly therefore not only keeping me awake but also going some way to dehydrating me? It is a whole new way of life that I shall have to learn and although there will be ups and down along the way I will no doubt endure more experiences like last night and although I don’t look forward to them, I shall embrace them as best I can.

The good news is, today I am back on form and firing on all my cylinders once more. The day yesterday improved as time went by, memories faded and I took on my correct amount of fluids and proteins beginning to feel like the new me I was getting to used to.

Long may it continue… 😉

‘Till tomorrow

WBFM is treating the fridge with respect.

2 thoughts on “Feeling A Bit Leftover

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