Whereas my usual day is normally centred around my writing with only a small amount of effort expended to refresh the brain cells, yesterday I was all about the practise with none of the theory. Yesterday there was a good amount of perspiration in ratio to the inspiration as it turned in to more of a doing day. I had a good deal of running around to do, starting with some filming with the BBC, then a pre op assessment for my procedure on Friday and finally some more filming, although I had been expecting to join a clinical study that I had promised to be a guinea pig on. Doing this much in a day is weird for me because I cannot stress how much time I spend looking for that little piece of inspiration.
I think that’s how I am able to write so much for this blog. I think up a relevant (okay, okay! sometimes not so much😳) subject, dream up a title and then start to “freestyle” and everything simply explodes onto the page. However, after yesterdays doing day I appear to be struggling somewhat. I think I may have a touch of the old Bloggers Block and I am fairly certain it may well be coming direct from my nerves wearing thin in anticipation for Friday to hurry up and arrive, then hurry up and be over.
Not the best way to live ones life, wishing away the days. Time, when you get to my age seems to slip by. The days fold into one another, the months roll on and the seasons change. It only seems like yesterday I was looking out of the window at four pm and thinking “where has the daylight gone”? Yet today, it will be light until well past six pm and that’s weird because to me, it doesn’t seem as though enough time has passed between those two reference points yet plenty has happened and over 10 weeks have gone by.
And even though I don’t like to wish the days away, I have been guilty of it whilst waiting to get to this point. Two days out from my operation and I couldn’t be happier. Yes I am somewhat apprehensive, viewing the upcoming big day and future lifestyle with a huge amount of trepidation, but I have been fortunate enough to spend this time writing a blog, a screenplay and a novel (I have only just started the novel – why oh why when I have enough to do already!) I prefer to fill my time with my brain doing most of the work. I dream things up all day long. I imagine scenarios and think of weird and wonderful character names. To clear my head and when I need to think I walk the dog. When I need some inspiration I expend some perspiration. It is a happy balance that seems to work for me. It is the route to my realising my transformation; and I just hope I can push that transformation all of the way.
A virtue I have extolled in the past “you do not get anything from life unless you put something in” I am now able to categorically state that this is true. I have put a great deal of effort into reaching the correct criteria for my procedure and now it will soon be a long forgotten memory as I change my life yet further still. I have also put a great deal of work into this blog and by writing everyday I have learned so much more about myself and how I enjoy doing it so much more than anything else I can do in front of a computer😉 Now I am sincerely hopeful of someday realising my goal of making it work for me. To allow me to share my imagination with anyone who would care to watch a movie, turn on a TV or pick up a book would be a dream come true.
As I said – Perspiration,Inspiration,Transformation.
And yesterday my transformation took a step closer after I was given the all clear and go ahead for surgery after having my Pre-Operative assessment at the John Radcliffe Hospital. I have to say that I was pretty stoked about this. I was given a full MOT. I had blood work done, nasal swabs, ECG, blood pressure and height and weight. It appears I passed with flying colours. My insides are positively infant like, it’s just a shame the rest of my body has had it! Anyway, the nurses looked after me very well, answered all my questions, told me what to expect and were even able to draw my blood without hurting me or turning me into a pin cushion so thank you very much for that!
After the MOT, I met up again with Adina Campbell to continue filming – we had spent the morning filming at my house and now they needed some “VT” (technical terminology there people) after the hospital to get my thoughts and see how I felt. Obviously as it was in front of the camera, I tried to keep it on the down low and remain calm but I can tell you, I was buzzing inside after having my MOT and getting the all clear for surgery. It’s really beginning to be hard to imagine where I will be next year with all of the changes that I am going through. I am so much more positive today than I have been in many years and I only expect that positivity to increase as time goes on post op, when I may finally get to see my hopes and dreams blossoming to fruition. I mean, it happens to other people doesn’t it… Anyway, Adina and I met in a park with the cameraman, a really cool guy by the name of Jono who filmed us as we went for a short walk whilst chatting about how I was feeling, what my thoughts were in regards to where I had been and where my life was heading. You know, general TV’y kind of things, or at least what I imagine TV’y kind of things are like 😳 Honestly though, it was such great fun filming different shots and cuts and do-overs. Just like the real thing ☺️
Afterward, we went back to the studio to do an interview with Bruno Sgromo, the surgeon, but after waiting all evening it turned out he couldn’t make it! No dramas, we will now meet tomorrow at the studio and finish off the recording so it can be edited for broadcast on Thursday evening.
All of those hopes and dreams aside, I am finding that one thing you do get asked to do an awful lot of when on the hospitals “database” for want of a better word, is you are asked to help with any studies relating to weight reduction surgery. I was contacted on Wednesday of last week asking me to be part of a new study to do with MRI Scans and whether they can be used to measure liver scarring, fat deposition and iron deposition. So yesterday a third thing was added to my schedule. I had agreed to be on Dr Michael Pavlides clinical study so now it was time to step up. To be honest, I really don’t mind doing these studies for the research because it makes me feel as though I am putting something back in for having the NHS take such great care of me during my weight loss process to date. But time ran out and when I thought I would have to cancel it was rescheduled for Thursday morning due to no machine being available, so it means I will continue maintaining a positive balance in my Karma bank… 😉
So as I said, a busy day for me, so much so, precious little got written and I struggled to find time to drink all of my protein shakes and water; and eat all my apples and yogurts, but you should know me by now, I powered on through ’till every last morsel was but a mere memory on my tongue. One bit of good news though, I put my belt on to make myself smart for the filming and I was very happy to find that I had run out of holes.
It was too loose!
Stay out of the fridge.
P.s Sorry about the Boobs. Okay they are relevant with the perspiration but I wanted them more after reading a phrase that goes something like this:
“Boobs are like the sun, you can only stare at them directly for a few seconds, but if you put on a pair sunglasses, you can stare a them as much as you want” 😉