Everything Through A Straw

Well, I am honestly surprised at what I am about to say.

Yesterday, the first day of my two-day 800 calories per day limit, wasn’t too bad at all. I mean don’t get me wrong it was absolutely bloody awful, but it really wasn’t too bad. I managed to get through the day, so a big tick to me on that one, I didn’t try to kill anyone, break anything, eat a small child as they innocently passed by or even kick the dog.

Well done me

Well not really, I mean come on, all I’ve done is managed a day on third rations. I did what anyone can do, it’s not like it was forever. But here, in the western world where we have food mountains going to waste and fast food advertisements 24hrs a day, it is thought of as an achievement. Okay then, I’ll take the praise and support but in my heart of hearts, I really see that this is less of an achievement and more of a sensible option.

Let me tell you folks, if I can do it, anyone can do it. What’s more it’s good for you. Two days with lower rations is a great way of forcing the body to take the energy from your fat stores and thus start to burn off all that excess. The only hard thing is not thinking about food, but I did my best to keep myself active and mindfully employed and in the end it worked out.

I thoroughly recommend it :-/

The morning was a bit tough, I rose early instead of sleeping a bit longer (fewer hours conscious was my idea – an idea I have tried today so we will see if it helps) and immediately went to the kettle to start the process for a cup of loveliness, Yorkshire Gold Tea. The choice of champions. After a couple of cups the stomach started to grumble and I began to think about bacon fried bacon with a side order of bacon. Hmm, this is no good, so I decided it might be time to write an entry to this blog. As I wrote, the hunger pangs eased thus proving I also need to keep my mind busy for the day and not let my thoughts wander towards cream cakes and hamburgers. The usual daily tasks would still have to be completed, but now I would be mindful of each of them. Keeping the grey matter occupied was the task and you have no idea how unexciting concentrating on the balancing of ones bank account can be!

I listened to the radio and when I say listened, I mean really listened. I actually heard what they were saying and didn’t treat it simply as company or background noise. I listened properly and even attempted the magnificent Ken Bruce’s “Pop Master” music quiz in a bid to further help pass the time, however, I shan’t embarrass myself by sharing my score :-/ Still the morning past and I rewarded myself with a skinny latte, home-made with my Krupps Espresso machine and some heated up 1% milk. Who needs Costa?

Then headed off to collect the dog.

Poor soul, he didn’t know what was going to hit him, I was going to walk and walk and walk. Well that was the plan. It turned out a little different however. We had not gone far when he obviously had a different idea which he began to put into action. We had just gotten to the top of a lane from where it’s either walk back home or disappear over the horizon and be gone for a couple of hours and thats where it happened he played me like a tiny harmonica, a really small one built for dogs. He started to slow down, he started to puff and pant forcing me into regular stops as he caught up.

And I really don’t walk fast….

So that was the long walk out of the window and we began to head back slowly and always at his pace, yet it appeared the closer we got to my mother’s house, the brighter and more active he became, with him ending the walk, running down the road and up the path to her front door! Little monkey, he just wanted to stretch his legs, use me to clean up his un-perfumed parcel and then bugger off back home to lay in front of the fire. Well played young man, well-played.

Well it was going to be a long day at this rate, even the dog didn’t want to waste time helping me waste time. There was nothing for it, I was going to have to seek alternative time-wasting measures. So I drove around a bit, called on a friend, watched a terrible car crash of a TV show then finally returned home.

Only three hours until my dinner time. I thought I would struggle, but to be honest as difficult as it was, I really didn’t. I surfed the inter web, wrote to several online publications including Huffington Post and asked if they would be interested in some cross blogging action. Hopefully the answer will be in the positive should one come. Anyway eventually the time passed and it was soon dinner. Hooray for me. I went to the fridge to get out my ingredients.

Oh Bugger!

I had forgotten to go the supermarket and pick up the two main things that help to make up the dish I was going to prepare. So I had fish and boiled potatoes instead. It didn’t matter, it felt like I was eating a meal fit for a king. It was everything I ever wanted it to be and more.

At least it was giving the feeling back to my teeth.

I find it to be a bit of a weird feeling, not eating. I find that my teeth start to almost go numb and become useless in my mouth when they aren’t regularly challenged with the task of mastication. Thankfully I was at least eating some solid food, but it did make me think about once I have the procedure of a gastric sleeve, I won’t actually be allowed it for several weeks post op. This is all due to the fact the stomach is so small, even small food pieces can stretch the re-sized banana shaped pouch and secondly, the scar tissue inside the stomach can be aggravated or even worse, it can create pressure on the stitches or staples leading to vomiting.

Everything through a straw.

So I’ve got that to look forward to, which is nice.

Anyway, today, I am happy as I only have to manage one more day and after having a completion under my belt, I know that it is do-able. I visited the doctor this morning and he told me this is my one chance to do something about my weight and I must follow the rules without exception, lest I be removed from the program. This proved not so much as a wake up call but it certainly served to put things more fully into perspective and understand that I have been a very lucky boy to be considered for this help, let alone actually get to the point where I currently am.

With that in mind, today I shall count my 800 calories and enjoy every single one of them.

‘Till tomorrow

Stay out of the fridge.

One thought on “Everything Through A Straw

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